A Golden Stud
- 2 minutes ago
- 2 min read
When the good Lord put me together
On that fateful day in June,
He had parts that were left over.
He'd delivered me too soon.
A beautiful voice and bright blue eyes
Were the options he included,
With extra chins and bony shins
And a head that became denuded.
A face designed for radio,
Rounded shoulders and big ears
All came to define not quite divine
As I travelled through the years.
Oh what to do to become unique?
And fix my Elmer Fudd.
This was the year to start with my ear,
And to add a golden stud.
One day I went to Hillsborough Street,
Beside old NC State,
Ducked into a tattoo parlor
A bit nervous of my fate.
At 75 what on earth would drive
A logical man to seek
The pain and fear of a pier-ced ear
That might brand him a hippy freak.
I’d asked my friend ChatGPT
What it thought of this
“If not now, oh when?” it asked.
“This moment do not miss.”
“Step out, step out, step out”, it said.
“And make your look unique.”
God had done all that he could,
Now add a touch that’s chic.
My piercer’s name was Christian.
The news of that was good.
“Will this hurt” I asked the lad.
“The pain can be withstood.”
My only hesitation
When I gazed upon his wall
Was his official certification
For CPR y’all.
If this was safe and painless
I wondered from the start
Why the hell would Christian
Have to start my heart.
It was over in a minute
The pain was not intense
The stud and the penetration
60 dollars and 10 cents.
Back on the street I walked to my car
Climbed in and looked in the mirror
It all seemed right despite the fright
My uniqueness now was nearer.
I did it for the grandkids,
I did it for myself.
It was time to reach for fashion,
Put my fears upon the shelf.
No not Quasimodo
Or even Elmer Fudd
Would dare to go see Christian
To add a golden stud.